Sometimes we set ourselves up for failure and don’t
even know it. For example, how many
times have you changed your behavior to achieve a certain result like losing 10
pounds, only to backslide once you reached your goal and wind up back where you
started? Many of us seem to swing on a
perpetual pendulum because our focus is on a short-term outcome rather than an
ongoing change.
This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot
lately given my new interest in fitness competitions. In this sport there’s a lot of concentration
on upcoming competitions. There’s kind
of this outward pressure that you should always be gearing up for the next one.
But once the competition is over you don’t want to end up burnt out, crabby and
miserable because you can’t sustain the herculean efforts you put in
temporarily.
I’ve come to see it’s better to have a long-term
mindset where you purposefully fall in love, not with the end outcome, but with
the actual things you need to do on a regular basis. Fall in love with the process of improving.
In my case this means working out hard, watching my
diet and developing my stage presence.
Rather than see these things as nasty chores or sacrifices I must make
for a little while, I am now seeing them as exceptional skills that benefit me
and that I am lucky to get to do every day.
I’ve given up seeing the end state as the trophy or even fixating on the
end state at all.
This philosophy applies to any goal, for example a
person who wants to be a top sales person can decide to fall in love with
making lots of exceptional sales calls, getting better at it all the time. Someone who is seeking a long term love
relationship can start to consciously enjoy the activity of dating, becoming a
better and better person to date with each outing, all with the knowledge that
that special person is coming.
When you develop a passion for the process of
improvement you develop positive habits.
Success then becomes a natural byproduct of what you’re doing. Instead of riding that pendulum of
frustration, you hop on a rocket ship of inevitable victory. Your success becomes a foregone conclusion.
